Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 In. Women

Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 In. Women
Film poster
Also known as	National Lampoon's Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 In. Women
Genre	Comedy
Written by	Julie Brown Charlie Coffey
Directed by	Julie Brown Richard Wenk
Starring	Julie Brown Peter DeLuise Anne De Salvo Stanley DeSantis Eric "Sparky" Edwards Khrystyne Haje John Robert Hoffman Sam McMurray Stella Stevens Adam Storke Dick Miller Stacey Travis
Theme music composer	Christopher Tyng
Country of origin	United States
Original language	English
Production
Executive producers	David Jablin James P. Jimirro
Producers	Peter Manoogian J. Marina Muhlfriedel
Cinematography	Rex Nicholson
Editor	Debra Chiate
Running time	82 min.
Original release
Network	Showtime
Release	August 21, 1994 (1994-08-21)

National Lampoon's Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 In. Women is an American 1994 Showtime television film that parodies two sensational news stories from the 1990s: the Tonya Harding-Nancy Kerrigan incident, and the John and Lorena Bobbitt incident. The film is presented as a double feature, with Julie Brown starring in both segments.^[1] The title is a takeoff of Attack of the 50 Foot Woman.

The film is presented as two parts of a double feature, the titles being Tonya: The Battle of Wounded Knee and He Never Gave Me Orgasm: The Lenora Babbitt Story.

Figure skater Tonya Hardly (Brown), desperate to win the gold medal in the Olympics, tries to eliminate competitor Nancy Cardigan (Khrystyne Haje) by hiring someone to injure her; although she only suffers a small bruise. The news story is so tragic and heart-rending that all of Tonya's co-conspirators turn themselves in and finger her. Sailing above the scandal, she goes on to compete at the 1994 Winter Olympics, but is undone by her lack of talent and undersized panties.

Lenora Babbitt (Brown), having been recently pardoned for her crimes, tells Dick Langley (Sam McMurray) about the events that had led up to her arrest: She had cut off the penis of her drunken husband, Juan Wayne Babbitt (Adam Storke), because he could not satisfy her sexually. After it was devoured by a dog, Dr. Kelloc (Stanley DeSantis) was able to transplant one from a deceased biker. However, Lenora learns that the biker's widow (Anne De Salvo) now has "visitation rights" to it; thus, when she and Juan perform a re-enactment of the incident on TV, she actually cuts off his new one. He ends up becoming a transsexual, saying on talk shows that he now understands how hard it is to be a woman.

The film includes animated sequences in which Tonya and Lenora are watching the picture at a drive-in theater. They arrive together in a car at the beginning, Tonya cheers after the first feature, and the two grinning women drive off at the end.

The television film was promoted on the cover of the September/October 1994 issue of National Lampoon magazine.^[2]

In 2008, Julie Brown was given permission by Showtime to issue this movie on DVD (Showtime had previously only issued it on VHS) and currently sells copies on her eBay profile and online store.^{[citation needed]}

An article in the Los Angeles Times covering the production commented, "What’s the only thing more frightening than a pair of 5-foot-2 females with a chip on their shoulders? That same pair in ice skates and stilettos, argues “National Lampoon’s Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 Women,” premiering Sunday on Showtime."^[3]

The film received generally a very mixed retrospective assessment,^[4] Vanity Fair even calling it "dreck".^[5] "Despite an impressive supporting cast, both minifeatures are crude ..." commented another reviewer.^[6]

• Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 In. Women at IMDb
• Attack of the 5 Ft. 2 In. Women at AllMovie
• National Lampoon's Attack of the 5' 2" Women at Movies.TVGuide.com